the "consuming/creating" dance

creativity Oh my goodness, you guys!

Where to even start... I feel like I'm on a roller-coaster of emotions around starting my business. I know that's a super cliche analogy, so let me temper it by saying my roller coaster is not one of those crazy ones where they strap you in standing up, and your legs dangle into empty space as you do multiple loop-de-loops. My roller coaster is more like an old-timey one that's made out of wood, where you sit in the little car with a bar across your knees, and you hear the clattering of the wheels as you go up the hill before the drop. The drop isn't very steep, but it sure looks like it from the top.

OK, Noble, that's enough analogies. Get back to the point.

(And that, folks, is what my inner voice sounds like! And yes, she calls me by my last name.)

Well, here I am. Showing up for a blog post. Not at all sure what to write about, or how to make it coherent and neat and tidy, with points made and a concise ending tying it all together. But a writer writes. And a blogger blogs. And I made a commitment to myself at the beginning of this blog that I would share my process of building a business with you. Which, I want to do, and it seems like a terrific idea, until I realize that it isn't a neat and tidy process at all, not by a long shot!

I thought it was. I thought if I just followed Life Coach X's Questionnaire A, then input the answers into ECourse B, then out would pop Business Plan C. Much like doing your taxes, right?

But... it's like that, and then it's also not like that at all. There are steps you can follow. But they are not rigid steps that everyone follows, and they are not all that you need to get to the end goal. What you also need to get to the end goal is daily showing up to do the work.

You see, I've realized in these last few months, that I look at women like Emily Thompson or Kathleen Shannon, who are kicking serious ass as creative entrepreneurs, and I want to be there, be them. I want a thriving business. I want to speak what I've learned about clients and work, in a confident voice, to thousands of others. I want to be fully earning a living from my creative work. I want to love what I do AND get paid well for it. There's nothing wrong with wanting that, and in fact it's really good to have inspiration like these women, but it means that then I look at all the steps between where I am standing, and where they are standing, and I let the breadth of that work and the time it will take to get there, overwhelm me.

It overwhelms me because I forget that it is one blog post at a time. One 10-minute "bite" of work at a time. And then repeated, and repeated again. That is what gets you there.

It sounds SO simple and I suppose that it is. When such a simple idea ("just keep showing up") is held up against what feels like the chaotic, crazy, hyper-informed reality of daily life, well, part of me thinks, "Nonsense. How could that simple idea ever make a difference?"

But I only have to look at this little blog's archives so far to see that it does. Even though it's only been a few months, I have kept showing up. I am doing the work. I am learning. I am then applying those lessons.

And one thing I am learning is that it is a dance between creating, and consuming, that gets you there.

For example, I am adoring the podcast Being Boss. I listen hungrily every week and I am in the Facebook group they have started. I also recently bought the book Creative, Inc and am devouring it.

Listening to a podcast or reading a book, even if the ideas in it are great, is consuming. It is not creating. The advice of these creative entrepreneurs is enriching me, certainly, but it's also taking me away from doing the work. The work which is doing the creating, doing the writing. And in order to make headway, in order to get the portfolio up, and to do good work for my clients, I must be in creating mode, not consuming mode.

Anyway, whew!! So here I am at the end of a blog post that I wasn't sure would even come out of my brain and through my fingers, into the keys and into the computer. What I've remembered through this blog post is to show up. Do the work. Put down the book or the podcast, however amazing they are, and get uncomfortable and do some work.

(And then take a break and watch Downton Abbey, which I'm way late to the party on, and which I've just started watching this week. Because life is not at all work, not by a long shot. But that's fodder for a future blog post!)

And as for an actual update of progress, well, I've been doing some thinking about personal branding and what sort of logo I might want to have (as I started to talk about in this post); I'm thinking about doing research into contract writing and how to set out clear expectations with clients, and I've put two pieces of work up in my portfolio! You can see them here. I'll put more up in the next little while.

I hope you're having a great week filled with excitement, joy, and interesting old-timey roller-coasters of emotion.

xo Leah

life lately // mid-march 2015

Well, I've been working on a blog post about my branding process to follow up from last week's post, but it is just not coming together in time for this week! So instead, I thought I would share some lovely photos of "life lately". I always liked writing "Life Lately" posts over at Dream Big Cape Breton (my previous blog) so I think I'll keep them up here too. Plus, I wanted to try out the "gallery" feature for sharing pictures, so this was a good excuse.

Speaking of this blog, should it have a name of its own? Or should I just call it, umm, my blog? That's something I'm thinking about these days.

I hope you're having a great week, getting creative, and getting outside too.

xo Leah

the one about 100 Rejection Letters, part 2: Values & Branding

leahnoble11
leahnoble11

So. Values!

(And yes, I frequently use crayons in my work. No, I'm not worried it makes me look childish. Well, maybe a little. But not a lot.)

(Also, Part 1 of this post is here, if you're just joining us now.)

Before I did this work that I'm about to share,  I'll admit that the word "values" made me think of dull, boring things like right-wing conservative politicians yammering on about "family values", which to me personally means very little. Actually, come to think of it, it does mean something, but when used in that context, it feels like words that are smokescreens and that have other, devious meanings, like "oppression" and "intolerance" under the guise of "family values."

But I trust Tiffany (my life coach). And I'm learning to trust the process. So when, after a coaching call where we talked about how I wanted to use social media less, she gave me her workbook "Social Media Rehab" and I read a section in it about values, I thought, "OK, I'll trust Tiffany on this. I'll give this values stuff a shot."

Also, Tiffany had shared her "brand tree" with us in the 100RL program. I'll show you my own brand tree in a bit (once I tell you how I figured out what to put in it) but this, basically, is a brand tree:

leahnoble12
leahnoble12

And your values are at the bottom, and what the rest of it all springs from. Well, without knowing my values, I couldn't fill in the rest! So I took a deep breath, and stared down the big scary list of values to pick out the ones that resonated with me.

From Tiffany Han's Social Media Rehab workbook, a section on values.
From Tiffany Han's Social Media Rehab workbook, a section on values.
From Tiffany Han's Social Media Rehab workbook, a section on values.
From Tiffany Han's Social Media Rehab workbook, a section on values.

Like all the other exercises so far, at first, looking at the task, I was scared. I didn't know where to start. I wanted to just not do it. But then I picked up the pen, and wrote something. (Or in this case, circled something.)

The thing about values is, they're super subjective. What do they really mean? You could argue that forever. But I haven't got forever, and if I did, I wouldn't want to spend it debating what "accomplishment" or "goodwill" really look like. So, again, another theme that's emerging (along with "so I picked up the pen, and wrote something"): I went with my gut.

The other feeling I encountered was feeling like I should value all these things. These are all good things. But, to be blunt, you can't pick them all. So move on, Leah!

After I picked my top ten, I ranked them using this exercise.

From Tiffany Han's Social Media Rehab workbook, a section on values.
From Tiffany Han's Social Media Rehab workbook, a section on values.

And then a week later, I had a call with Tiffany, and that's when the fun started. (Ha!) It felt like Alice in Wonderland a bit, because what she did was then compare each value to one other value. "Would you rather have wisdom without trust, or trust without wisdom?" Well, how the heck do you decide that? "Would you rather have wisdom without love, or love without wisdom?" "Would you rather have wisdom without fun, or fun without wisdom?" I quickly felt disoriented in a never-ending maze of values that quickly lost meaning. But it was fast. Pick one of the two and move on. It took about thirty minutes and in the end I was a bit worn out. And in the end my list of values had got re-arranged again.

leahnoble_10
leahnoble_10

The good thing to keep in mind is that these things are always in flux. This list is not set in stone. I will grow and change as my life continues and my values can too. But having a list is a starting point. It's a solid base to stand on. To look at and say, "I need these things to be present in my life, day to day, to feel good." You can also think about how you are honoring each value, in a given day. How am I honoring wisdom today? How am I honoring communication? And the honoring of them can be small acts, like for example, going to the library to be surrounded by many people's wisdom in the form of books.

So then, the next step: I put those 10 values in my brand tree.

The next thing is coming up with your three brand words. I asked Tiffany about this and she said to spend some time looking at brands I admire and think about what I connect with, about them. And to think about the brand words in this way: "I want everything my business/I does/do to be __________ or ___________ or __________." And, to think about the value I want to provide to my customer, and how I want to provide it.

The three brand words I came up with are clarity, groundedness, and beauty. Again, these can change! That's the freeing part.

A brand tree
A brand tree

Then it felt like it was time to start creating a brand look. And that's where I hit another wall. I'm a designer, so I feel a lot of should inside myself about what I should be able to do. I did some research (which, to be honest, is usually a way of stalling, for me, not actually productive) and downloaded some free and cheap PDFs from other people talking about how to brand yourself.

And then (can you see a theme here?) I picked up the pen, and wrote. LOL.

Next week, I'll share my branding process so far,  which will include a cool eCourse I took from Braid Creative. (Which, holy crap, if I could afford them at all right now, would I ever want to work with them! Check them out, they're badass lady bosses. I love it!)

I hope you have a wonderful, productive and inspired week, my dears, and don't be shy -- it thoroughly makes my day to hear your thoughts!

xo Leah

the one about "100 Rejection Letters" - part 1

leahnoble_01
leahnoble_01

So! Time to fill y'all in on what brought me to the point where I was ready to stop writing "Dream Big Cape Breton," and to start my own business.

Back in October, I signed up for a program by life coach Tiffany Han. It was called "100 Rejection Letters." To be honest, I didn't care what it was called or what it was about, I just knew that I was itching to work with Tiffany! I had been on her email newsletter list for a couple of years, and I just love her mix of sass, real-life know-how and kick-yer-butt motivation. I had done a "pop-up" session with her in the summer when she offered a 45-minute session for $145. Yes, I paid $145 to talk to someone I don't know, in California, for 45 minutes. And it was effing worth it.

So back in October when I signed up, I really didn't know what the heck I wanted out of this program, I just knew that I was at a point in my life where I felt squeezed. When I looked at my planner, it was full of "shoulds". Full of appointments, meetings, and commitments that I was totally sick of. I didn't have any goals that I was excited about or working towards. I was writing Dream Big Cape Breton but there too I felt uninspired, bored, but more than that, STUCK. Stuck in a busy rut that wasn't actually producing good, juicy, exciting work, but that I felt I couldn't just, you know, stop.

Signing up for something is relatively easy. Then comes the work. And the work is tough, but it's the only way to move forward, out of this stuck place. Luckily -- Tiffany sent me a workbook. I love me a good workbook!

leahnoble_1
leahnoble_1

The first exercise you do is look at something she calls your CrazyFaith. (She talks more about that in the book but I'm not going to share too much from the workbook, except for the exercises I've done. However, this is a podcast episode she recorded a few weeks ago all about the concept of CrazyFaith, and it's crazy good.)

leahnoble_2
leahnoble_2

This page is full now, but when I first got the book it was a big blank page and I had no idea how to fill it. I looked at it like: "What in the heck do I put in here? What are my core beliefs? What are the non-negotiables I hold as truth??!" I didn't know. I felt like I didn't have any. Maybe that was my problem! That I didn't have any core beliefs!

But I put pen to paper.  I had a little bit of faith in my ability to work it out, pull it out of myself. And in bits and pieces, a little bit one day and a little bit the next week, I wrote out things that felt weird or felt like they sounded good but maybe I didn't really believe them. They are the things I DO believe but had not been living. That's why I was feeling out of sorts! When I wrote them down, I realized I'm not sure how to live them. But that it's still OK to believe them. And to write them down.

So then the next thing you do is figure out your intentions.

leahnoble_3
leahnoble_3

Again, the page was blank when I first looked at the book. What do I want to get out of the program? Where do I want to be at the end of the process? Jesus! Those are tough questions. A whole year away... life could look super different. Or it could look the exact same. That's a lot of time to work with. And for someone who wrote a blog called "Dream Big," I was remarkably scared to do just that. To dream, and do it on a large scale. To STOP my "busy" life for a little bit, sit with myself, and get clear on what I want.

And again, the only way to really do it is to pick up the pen, and start writing things down. It's scary. For sure. Because once it's out of your brain, it's out of the shadows and into the light, and you can see it, you can see your own frightened but beautiful and powerful dreams. And then you want to make them actually happen -- which is also scary! Because what if you fail... et cetera.

But once I put the pen to paper and did some writing, some thinking, and some dreaming, it began to feel easier. It began to feel FUN. It began to feel natural, and okay, and good. And in line with me and who I am, really JIVING. And then I wasn't as afraid to SAY, "yeah, this IS who I am. This IS what I want. It may not be exciting and sparkly and sexy to anyone else. But it is exciting and sparkly and sexy to ME."

"Let's go all in on Leah," Tiffany said to me at the start of the program. And at that point I was going all OUT for everyone BUT Leah. So the words sounded weird, like a foreign language. Like, "what does that even mean?"

Then you write yourself a letter as if the year has gone by.

leahnoble_4
leahnoble_4

Again, at this point I didn't know what to say. But I put pen to paper. (There's a theme here!) I tried something out. I imagined it was a year later. I had already done my Intentions page and my CrazyFaith page so I had more of an idea of what my heart was wanting, what my soul was wanting. Now I started to imagine what that would turn into over the next year. It's freeing to let yourself think about this without worrying about how you'll actually make it happen!

And then you write a letter to yourself as a fan in two years time.

leahnoble_5
leahnoble_5

By this point I was getting in the swing of imagining, dreaming, and listening to my heart. To be honest with you, I still have no idea what the "Outside" series is going to be, but it is a word that is showing up again and again in my journalling and in my thoughts, so I'm going to follow that.

leahnoble_6
leahnoble_6

So once you're clear on your CrazyFaith, your intentions and what you want, the next section of the book is about preparing to pitch. (The idea behind the program is of course that you're going to get 100 Rejection Letters, so in order to do that, you need to pitch people for stuff, so that they can say yes or no.)

And this is the point where I got stuck. I didn't have a business yet, really, (despite having had a bunch of freelance clients over the past two years) so I had no idea who my ideal client would be. I could pick a person, but I wasn't clear at all on what I wanted to be doing as a business. I was even lukewarm on wanting to do graphic design at this point! So Tiffany suggested that instead of worrying about the ideal client, that I get super crystal clear on what I wanted. On my relationship. And to clear out the things I didn't want to be doing, on my schedule.

And faced with that, I got super scared. It's one thing to look at your own heart and dream big, but to look at your main relationship and ask the tough questions about it, knowing that if the answers come back that it's not working, that it might mean ending it, or changing things, well, that's not easy. And Adam and I have our differences, for sure, and I've felt insecure about that over the years, fearing that those differences mean we're not a good match.

But, after a coaching call with Tiffany, I realized that we are a good match. Our behaviours might be different sometimes -- he loves to stay home and relax, I love to get out and about, just as one example -- but deep down our values are the same. And when I started communicating some of this stuff to him, although he wasn't, like, all up in that coaching stuff, he was surprisingly receptive. My fear had been so huge that he would totally reject all of this stuff, (and consequently reject me) and he didn't.

It's funny how when I put down on my intentions page to "get clear with Adam about marriage and kids", I had thought the biggest obstacle would be communicating with him! It turns out, it was my own fear.

What I've learned over the last five months is that the thing about your intuition is that you really do know what you need to do. But so often that inner voice speaks in a whisper and its hard to hear. We've trained ourselves not to hear it. We've trained ourselves to be "good girls" so that people will like us. So often listening to our intuition means going against this and doing what WE want, whether or not someone else likes it.

And once I started writing things down, and kept writing things down, and started listening to what the heck that voice said, and KEPT listening to what the heck that voice said, I found I was going all in on me. I was giving myself what I needed. I was having thoughts like "Time doesn't stretch to accommodate what you cram into it -- schedule smart." And writing them down. Then a week later when I'd read it again I'd go, "Oh YEAH! That is still true!" and follow that advice.

So that's long enough for today! Next week, part 2: values! Which are way cooler than they sound!

I sincerely hope you have a productive, inspiring and beautiful week.

xo Leah

begin, again.

Every storm and snowfall brings new snow to shovel. Every time I lace up my boots, and pick up the shovel, and go out to the driveway, I must begin the process of shovelling it clear, again. Likewise, every day and meal brings new dishes to wash. Every time I approach the sink, tidy and scrape, pull on the rubber gloves, and turn the tap, I must begin the process of turning dirty dishes into clean ones, again. Every day.

There is a concept in Buddhism called the "beginner's mind" that I'm a little familiar with, thanks to my Buddhist dad. Basically it means that, no matter how much of an expert you become, it is a good practice to keep your mind open to new ideas, as if you were a beginner. While the expert's mind has only one right way to do things, the beginner's mind has many options.  Begin, again. It's frustrating sometimes - "what, this again?!" ... like the movie Groundhog Day, but it is also a reminder to take a deep breath, not overthink the process, and just... begin, again. Do the work.

***

This week, thanks to the wicked and wild wintry weather, I had some time to spend working on my own branding. It is kind of funny how scared I am to just sit down and do the work. Whatever resistance shows up when I'm doing work for a client is double when it comes to doing the work for myself! It continuously blows my mind how weird that is.

But, for three hours on Friday and a few hours today, I worked on my own branding. And, I'll definitely share more about this whole process at some point with you guys, but right at this moment I don't feel ready to. My intuition is telling me to keep it private a little bit longer, to let it gestate. And, I'm working to give space to my intuition in this whole process, so I'm going to honour that.

But, I will share it, soon -- I want to show you the questions I've been answering, about my company and my brand, and the mood board I'm making of inspiring textures and colours for the site. I want to share how I came up with my personal values, and why value-work is even important (hint: it's a lot cooler than it sounds), and what sorts of goals I'm setting for my business. 

If you're curious now, though, you can check out a couple of Pinterest boards I'm using to corral inspiration and ideas: My Brand Moodboard and I Love My Small Biz.

I hope you have a productive and inspiring week!

xo Leah

i have a new client, and she is me

snowywoods Oh man, so -- where to begin?!

On a whim last week I made this baby website public and then I wondered, "Oh no, what is my next step?"

And to be honest, at the thought of figuring out that next step, I felt paralyzed.

A part of me wanted to just grab a bunch of my work samples from school and the last year, and stick them on the website, just to have work to show. I came really close to doing that, but when I started to look over my work samples, I realized I wanted to change all of them some of them. Especially the ones from when I was in school; I've learned more since then and there are other design decisions I'd make now!

Another part of me wanted to show progress of some kind to you, my readers, but then I didn't have time to make any progress in the website design, so I couldn't.

So I did what I always do when I have a brain full of ideas and no idea where to start: I dumped them out. On paper. With a pen.

braindump

sitetodosThe first sheet is ideas for what I will blog about in this new space.

The second sheet is ideas for what needs to be done on this website.

Now, my other strategy for working through my ideas and figuring out needs to happen next, is to take a walk, and that's where the photo at the top of this post comes in. It's from a walk I took in the woods near my house, the other day. It's funny how I forget, until I am outside walking along, just how much good a walk does for me! The fresh air, the blue sky, the silence surrounding the crunch of my boots on the snow... all of that is a healing balm for my soul.

So, I guess this is my progress since last week! I've been walking, and scribbling, and thinking about what my plan is for this blog and this space.

Here's what I know so far:

  1. I want to blog once a week. This is way less than I used to post on my old blog (I aimed for daily), but it's about what I can handle right now. Being realistic and working with the time I have available is key, I think, to actually succeeding. Plus, my goal right now isn't to build a big blog audience (which is when you would want to blog consistently and daily), it is to work within my real life, and share progress, and I think once a week is a good sort-of "check in" point.
  2. I want to treat myself like my own client, and go through the whole process of design, from start to finish. That includes the hard work at the beginning of the process, of digging in to what my goals are, what my brand is, and spending time polishing up the samples of my work. All this work is not sexy, and it won't look on the surface like much is changing, but if I'm building a business that will last 40 years, it should have a solid foundation, right? These things take time.
  3. Part of treating myself like my own client is making sure I have time available to do the work. This means not taking on any new clients at the moment. Committing to myself that much, by saying no to potential work and let's face it, money, is kinda scary! But it also feels really good.
  4. I'm excited!

I'd love to hear from you... if you have questions or thoughts on my design process, or on building a business, or on anything at all really, get in touch!

 

blogging, I just can't quit you

So here we go again! (I wrote my first blog, huminbean, from 2002 to 2012, and my second blog, Dream Big Cape Breton, from 2012 to 2015.)

This time around, I'm blogging for me. I'm blogging for my business, which is in that sort of weird-awkward-teenager phase. My business exists, but it's still really young and just growing wings. Like a baby bird? An awkward teenage baby bird? I don't know... my metaphors are all over the place today.

Anyway, here we are! My business slash personal website. Currently there is no work on it. Some would say that's a big no-no, sharing it live before I've even put work on it, or branded myself, or any of that. And I totally get that, because as a graphic designer, my job is to think hard about what a product looks like, and about what impact that's going to have on the people looking at it. How will they judge it? How will that affect what they think about the product? And whether they buy it?

But, I'm sharing now because (A) that's how I roll -- I like to get started on things before they're done, and work on them as I go, and (B) I think it will actually be interesting to you as a reader, and as a potential client, to see how I take this site from a simple free Wordpress template to a full-fledged portfolio website, and what I learn along the way. (The template I'm using is Sela, by the way.)

For example, at the moment, you may have noticed, the URL or web address of this site is still the free Wordpress one, where my name is followed by ".wordpress.com" instead of just being "leahnoble.com". I do own the domain "leahnoble.com" and have actually been paying for it for a couple of years now even though I wasn't using it, just to make sure I would have it when the day came when I would need it. I'll switch it over in a week or so, and I'll show you how to do that if you want to.

Anyway, that's all for now. I'm excited to be blogging again, to be learning new things, and to be setting up my business properly. I can't wait to see what this awkward teenage/baby bird becomes!

I'd love to hear from you, too! Hit me up with any questions you may have.